Publication: Globe
Date: 19 Sept. 2011

The Globe rehashes the story that Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton are at each others' throats. Here are the headlines.

• Michelle Obama insults Hillary!
• It's war!
• First Lady's bitter outburst sparks tearful breakdown

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Publication: Globe
Date: 12 Sept. 2011

The Globe has one of those general guessing games on the front cover this week, with six faces surrounding the headline "Who Hates Who! Shocking fights and nasty insults" Obviously, the Globe knows that correct grammar would just insult and confuse its readership, which skews older and more Southern, so it decides not to write "Who hates whom!" (Quick rule I learned in school. Re-write a sentence using "he" or "him". Translate "he" to "who" and "him" to "whom".)

The pictures include Angelina Jolie making a rare appearance on the Globe cover, Kate Middleton, Danica Patrick, Kirstie Alley, Hillary Clinton and Joan Rivers.

I'm not sure this is fair, because I think nearly everybody hates Joan and Angelina.

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Publication: National Examiner

Date: 22 August 2011

Do you believe the low rent Examiner has inside information about the lives of people as protected as Bill and Hillary Clinton? Me, neither! But it's my job on this blog to publish all the headlines on the American supermarket rags, so here's what the low rent Examiner has to say this week.

Hillary has a heart crisis and has had terrifying blackouts this year. Bill has given an ultimatum.

If you believe the low rent Examiner.

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Publication: Sun
Date: 20 June 2011

The Sun gives us four prophecies for 2011, but none of them involve the End of the World or even so much as a plague or terrorist attack. Still, they have expiration dates, so they can be tested for accuracy.

Hillary Clinton is going to announce a run for the presidency.

Miss Betty White will buy a baseball team and they will win the World Series.

NASA files reveal why JFK really died.

(Did the shot come from outer space?)

And a weeping statue predicts Billy Graham's last days.

By the end of the year, I will report back on all these predictions.

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Publication: National Examiner
Date: 13 June 2011

There was a time when the Clinton marriage was prime tabloid fodder, but those days are long gone. This is only the second report of a Bill and Hillary Clinton marriage crisis is about a year and a half, and both reports have been in the low rent Examiner. The story says has Hillary packed on 50 lbs. after Bill threatened divorce.

Stay classy, low rent Examiner.

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