Publication: Globe

Date: 29 August 2011



The dogs in the AMI kennel seem to hate Sarah Palin, though I guess their "animosity" is largely due to having a bunch of sources coming out of the woodwork to blab about the former half-term governor. This week it's a cocaine scandal. She is supposed to be outraged about a bombshell report, and they show a picture of the place where she was seen snorting.



This is a nominee for Meanest Story of the Week.

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Publication: OK!

Date: 22 August 2011



I whine every time there's another Teen Mom story and not without cause. As of today, there have been more Teen Mom stories than there are about any other TV show I have a label for, with 39 since the beginning of the year, more than one a week.



This means more weeks with Teen Mom headline stories in 2011 so far than Kim Kardashian cover stories over the same time frame.



Pathetic on more levels than I can count.



In any case, there are pictures of Maci Bookout and Amber Portwood with the headline "Splits, drugs and money trouble".



I think I hate Teen Mom more than I hate Andrew Breitbart, but I'll admit the difference isn't great.

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Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 15 August 2011

The Flagship went after both Justin Theroux and Brad Pitt as drug addicts this week. They claimed Theroux was addicted to coke and heroin, though they used the phrase "his dark past". Brad Pitt's situation is made to sound present tense. Here are the headlines.

• Brad caught in dirty drug den
• Angie's rage
• How he got busted

I admit sheepishly I opened the Enquirer this week looking at the story about Chaz Bono's life threatening problem, a 2,000 calorie a day diet to lose weight.

Not life threatening.

I also browsed the Brad Pitt story. He was caught smoking marijuana.

That doesn't impress me much either, in terms of scandalous behavior.

Stay classy, Enquirer.

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Publication: National Enquirer

Date: 15 August 2011



Justin Theroux still isn't really famous by tabloid standards. He's still "Jen's Man" in the headlines, including this headline in the Enquirer this week about "his dark past" as a cocaine and heroin abuser. Looking online, I have seen no confirmation of this story anywhere.



This is a nominee for Meanest Story of the Week.

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Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 26 July 2011

Fresh trash tomorrow! Last trash of the week... right now!

The Enquirer reports that Paula Abdul's new fella is a former heroin addict.

I looked online for his name. He's Jeff Bratton. He owns a record label. In my book, that makes him lower than a heroin addict, but that's just me.

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Publication: Globe
Date: 25 July 2011

Welcome to gossip hell, Mister Tony Bennett! The singer, painter and national treasure, who will turn 85 next month, has his name dragged through the mud by the Globe. They write about a new "tell-all book" that details Mister Bennett's ties to the mob, his drug use and cheating.

I have made a new label, Call Him Mister, especially for this story. Many ladies have gotten the "Call Her Miss" treatment on this blog, wonderful stars who have been around long enough they should be off limits to the garbage peddlers of the supermarket checkout rags. Mister Bennett is the first of his gender to get similar treatment here.

This is a nominee for Meanest Story of the Week.

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Publications: In Touch, OK!
Date: 25 July 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Teen Mom nonsense abides. I report with no further comment.

• OK!: Maci & Kyle Split: She's still in loved with Ryan
• In Touch: Teen Mom dating disasters!
  In love with cheaters, druggies and a killer!
  Leah: Since Corey left, she's hooking up with three different guys!
  Farrah: Can't stop crying over new violent bad boy
  Maci: Wedding on hold! Why her ex Ryan is to blame
  
  

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Publication: Globe
Date: 11 July 2011

Hulk Hogan has had a reality TV show for a while now, but in 2010 had no appearances on the covers of the supermarket rags. Now he's on his second cover in as many weeks, this time because his ex-wife Linda has written that favorite thing in the gossip world, the "tell all book". The Globe says it's full of sex, drugs and lies, and for once, I believe them. She's exactly the kind of person who would write a tell all book.

For example, there was a story a year ago claiming a tell all book from Tipper Gore would send Al to jail. Tipper is exactly the kind of person NOT to write a tell all book.

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Publication: Star
Date: 13 June 2011

Star magazine says Angelina Jolie weighs 99 lbs. and is hooked on heroin. Brad's family is planning an intervention.

This last detail makes all the rest less believable, because Brad's family really hates her.

This is a nominee for Meanest Story of the Week.

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